The Stage as a Refuge: How Theater Became My Path to Healing

Dec 5

This past year has been incredibly tough for me—honestly, the hardest year of my life. I lost one of my best friends over a year ago, and the effects of grief have been unpredictable and overwhelming. My world seemed to turn upside down, and I felt lost and disconnected. I stepped away from theater when, looking back, I should have gone to it. She was my closest Jewish friend, and we would talk endlessly about life, growing up, adolescence, and of course, our shared Jewish heritage in a still-divided world. She was like family to me. She always encouraged me to follow my passions, and she loved how much I loved theater. She was heartbroken when she couldn’t make it to my last production, but I promised her she would have many more chances to see me on stage.

I grew up doing musical theater—performing from 3rd grade all the way through high school. I dabbled in a few small productions in college, but they were just plays, no musicals. And that’s okay. College was a time for exploring new things, trying different paths, and dealing with the ups and downs that come with it—because let’s face it, who doesn’t go through a lot in college? Fast forward 6-7 years, and I found myself thinking, I NEED to get back to musical theater! I missed it more than I realized. Looking back now, I feel incredibly grateful that I found my way back to the stage. It’s a truly healing, magical space.

So, I took a leap and auditioned for my first professional community show in the Bay Area with Palo Alto Players. The show was Fiddler on the Roof, and to my absolute delight, I got in! I was cast as one of the youngest daughters, Sphrintze. I never could have predicted just how much this show would mean to me—what an unexpected gift and golden opportunity.

With a show like Fiddler on the Roof, the messages are so clear: community, family, change—all things my late friend and I would often talk about. This show meant more to me than I can fully express. Fiddler on the Roof was the first musical my Jewish grandmother took me to see. The beautiful spirit and interconnectedness of the show brought me closer to my heritage, my family, and to my dear friend who is no longer with us.

Before rehearsals started, I was still in a rough place. But as we delved deeper into the show, I realized how much I needed theater—not just the past year, but always. I didn’t realize how much I needed the healing power of the arts. Rehearsals, performances, and time spent with everyone became my sanctuary. I was carrying so much emotional weight at the beginning of rehearsals, and the whole cast and creative team helped me immensely through the healing process. It’s something I will never forget. This show helped me through the waves of grief and reminded me of the power of connection and community.

A huge thank you to the Director, Jen, and the Music Director, Amanda, for giving me the opportunity to portray Shprintze—her youthful spirit was something I deeply needed. Thank you to the cast for helping me reconnect with the stage and rediscover the beauty of shared creativity, the power of collaboration, and the joy of being part of something larger than myself. I’m so grateful to have been a part of something so beautiful and meaningful.

The stage is where I feel most fulfilled, and this beautiful community has shown me just how important it is to be there for one another. I’m incredibly grateful to have theater back in my life. The love, support, and inspiration I found doing this show is something I will carry with me forever.

To Palo Alto Players and the wonderful creative cast of Fiddler on the Roof, thank you for welcoming me back to the theater, and for helping me rediscover a family I didn’t know I was missing.